In spite of the constant BS, I’m happier than I seem….

One of the many, many, many, many reasons that I’m moving out and looking for a studio (my goal was to find a new place by the end of the month, but the month is almost over, so we’ll see). I messaged this to my sister early this morning:

so, i have no clue wth is going on in this apartment right now
it’s 6:30a
my roommates got home about 10ish minutes ago
at least one of them is wasted
so they come in, stumbling, open my door and immediately try to close it
i said “wtf”
so i locked it
eventually someone comes back to try to re-open it, banging it
one of them was ‘whispering’ obscenities to me from outside my door
then slips some packet of paper under it
i take a look at these papers
they’re notes from their master’s program
they’re ridiculously loud right now (given that it’s 6:30 in the morning), one of them is trying to tell his girlfriend to go home (now he thinks she needs to leave, right)

I messaged the above to a friend:

shit D:
exactly, and they act like i’m unfair for not liking them
i’m tempted to rip up this packet and sprinkle the pieces outside their doors
or you could just “lose” them
i will throw them out at the very least
I ripped up that packet and threw it away
you have enforced the Fuck This Shit Act of 2013
well done
Thank you, A for effort

they wrote me a note to apologize. i ripped that up and put that letter plus that ripped up packet on the kitchen counter


Good things do happen here in Madrid too, in case anyone was curious. My closest Spanish/Sevillian friend was wondering that too. A few weeks ago he asked me, “Are you happy here?” At the time I said that in general I am, but moving overseas is always challenging with tons of problems. 

It’s definitely been a struggle, and in some unexpected ways. On Friday a friend and I were talking about how the things we expected to be difficult are going really well, it’s everything else that seems to be a struggle. Spanish bureaucracy and my appointment to get my foreigner’s ID card? Easier than the DMV, more like waiting in a long line at the mall or the library. My job, the kids, their level of English? As draining as teaching can be, and although one of my classes has the most difficult kids in the school behavior-wise (objectively, it’s known throughout the school), I’ve yet to enjoy a job this much. That either says a lot about me, or a lot about the jobs I’ve had…especially since I know I couldn’t do work like this forever.

For me, struggling here compared to struggling back at home, or struggling this past year with all the drama and chaos that was thrown my way, has been very different. I feel like my future here has much more potential, at least regarding the more-or-less immediate future. My problems here have very feasible solutions…especially without the toxicity of my life in Chicago weighing me down and clouding my mind, making me physically ill from stress.  And that aside, I didn’t come to Madrid with romantic notions of expat life, especially since this is not my first time living in Spain (although I did envision less BS than what I’ve had to deal with, I’ll admit that much).  Living here long-term has been a goal of mine for a while.

Almost nothing worth having comes easily.


~ by Revé on November 24, 2013.

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